This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I just blew my weed a kiss
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
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