Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
When did we convert life to cartoon?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
