After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I am full of burrito and curiosity
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
