Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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