Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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