tell your sister to shave her snatch
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Let's get the cat blown out
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
