We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
