dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize