What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
