No awkward lesbian experiences without me
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
