I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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