woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
