I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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