We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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