Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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