rhymes with "ouble enetration"
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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