i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize