I just pynch a tree in the face
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
wow bdsm is so cute
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize