Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Randomize