Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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