just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
