She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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