you win again, gameday.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize