i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Drunk walkin through police station. America
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
