in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
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