wake up i wanna do it froggy style
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
