I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
