Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
