the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
