Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize