just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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