I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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