sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
