Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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