I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Randomize
