You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Randomize
