So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize