I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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