I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
