I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Green mimosas i think yes
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
