and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
