he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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