So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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