i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
What drink are we having for lunch?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
