I hate your face
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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