I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
babies were throwing up all over the place
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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