i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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