What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
