Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
