Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
