We're facebook friends in real life
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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