so that wasnt chicken after all
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize