She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
